The 2008 American Elections: Calvin Coolidge or George Bush?

It is characteristic of an American election cycle to consist of nothing but a steady stream of prevarication and unadulterated bullshit. Since it is not possible for an electorate to vote sensibly or make informed choices in the absence of an informed electorate, I have decided to wade into the debates myself, and do the American voter a big favor by clearly spelling out the true meaning of the policy issues confronting American voters in the upcoming elections. Somebody has to do it, and since it seems that no one else will, I guess the task falls to me. I have always believed that if you know enough to complain that somebody else isn’t doing something then you know enough to do it yourself. With that thought in mind I will begin clarifying the issues by cutting through that smokescreen of political bullshit that currently characterizes America’s political process.

In order to clarify all the issues for the prospective American voter it is required that I adopt the ‘pro-capitalist’ position, since all the options on the table are variants on this theme. I am not a supporter of that perpetual gun fight at the OK Corral myself, and I believe that the time has come for economic democracy since America is the perfect example of how impossible it is to have ‘political democracy’ when the economy is organized along fascist lines, for this form of economic fascism and the concentrations of power it creates is incompatible with political democracy. I am a revolutionary and for that reason I support cooperation and democracy rather than competition and fascism, but that option will never be on any ballot in America so for that reason it is required that we only discuss the issues from the perspective of a supporter of capitalism.

Now in order to understand the issues in America’s election campaigns and all the weird things that have been going on in that country over the course of this decade it is important to understand that American capitalism is in a severe crisis, having taken one to many bullets down at the global gunfight at the OK Corral. Currently America’s trade deficit is climbing towards one trillion dollars a year which can be compared to the putrefaction and the odors of decay wafting up from a corpse. This has created an imbalance in the global capitalist system, and this is unsustainable over the long term. Such a lop sided economy indicates that just as American capitalism is in decay and not selling much these days, thus resulting in the imbalance, so the American dollar is also grossly overvalued. The only way to restore equilibrium to the global capitalist system now is for the American dollar to get flushed down a big shitter and become the American Peso. This is what I would call the laissez faire solution of a noninterventionist such as a Calvin Coolidge, the type of president who would religiously obey the dictates of the international system by letting the market decide. Since the market has already decided that Americans should be paying about 7 or 8 bucks a gallon for gas at the pumps and double or triple the price for everything else they will have to pay for with that American Peso, of course a Calvin Coolidge would accept the verdict of the market and just allow the crash to happen while lecturing everyone to accept reality and learn to deal with the judgments of those sacred capitalist markets.

No one is to thrilled about running Coolidge as a candidate in an election these days. It is for this reason that we saw such things as the Supreme Court boosting a George Bush into the White House, since the alternatives for the supporter of capitalism these days comes down to a choice between Coolidge or Bush, and no one wants Coolidge which then explains why everyone is supporting Bush, no matter how unpopular the man might be or how hostile the population is to his program. Even the Democrats are only running ‘Bush Lite’ as their horse in the election races because Democrats do not want to run Calvin Coolidge in the election for fear that Coolidge would probably be able to beat Bush, and then take over the White House only to bring about the complete ruin of every capitalist supporter in that country.

Calvin Coolidge was a true conservative, and the last true conservative the American’s have ever seen in office was probably Richard Nixon. Like Coolidge, Nixon was a devout practitioner of laissez faire economics, and when the markets decided that the dollar should be pulled from the gold standard so that markets could decide the value of the dollar just as they decide the value of all commodities, Nixon did his duty and the result was stagflation and interest rates that rocketed up to around 20 percent and other painful and wrenching changes that typically follow upon some of these laissez faire prescriptions demanded by some market. That was the last time the Republicans ever ran a conservative as their candidate for office, and from the time of Reagan the trend has been for the Republicans to run what are called ‘neo-conservatives’ instead.

Now a ‘neo-conservative’ like George Bush is no Calvin Coolidge, and there is quite a big difference between the laissez faire non-interventionist policies of a Coolidge and the aggressively interventionist policies of a George W. Bush. The most notable difference between a Bush and a Coolidge is that under a true laissez faire conservative supporter of capitalist marketing ideology the Americans would already be paying for everything they purchase using the American peso, while under an aggressively interventionist neo-conservative like George W. Bush, Americans are still using dollars to this day, and the man has been in office for about 7 years now, and so we can see how up to the present time his interventionist strategies have proven successful in buying everyone more time and pushing the great convulsions of the crisis of collapsing American capitalism off into some indeterminate point in the future.

The neo-conservative strategy of the Bush Administration is also, in a slightly ‘lighter’ version, the strategy of the Democrats (as you might recall, when the Democrats in congress were giving Bush a problem just a while back, he scolded them, saying, to paraphrase him, ‘you don’t like my strategy? All right then what’s your strategy.’ That shut the Democrats up real quick, for as we know the only strategy the Democrats have had for the last 7 years has been ‘Bush Lite’, and given that they have already had seven years to come up with an alternative strategy and still haven’t been able to think of one, it was no surprise that they shut up pretty quick, since apparently they couldn’t think of a strategy of their own on such short notice. Given that the alternative to Bush is Coolidge and the American Peso I would imagine that the Democrats will return to their usual strategy of presenting themselves as ‘Bush Lite’ for the foreseeable future, unless someone suddenly comes up with a different strategy, which seems unlikely.)

Now with the Democratic voters becoming more and more irate when they see that party of their s promoting the ‘Bush Lite’ option, it seems important to me that someone explain to those Democratic voters just exactly why their party is behaving this way. It appears that most Democratic types do not understand the issues and for that reason we see Democratic voters attempting to pressure the Democrats to run Calvin Coolidge in the next election. Even a Dennis Kucinich is not a liberal, for these days to be anything other than a neo-conservative is to be Calvin Coolidge and a laissez faire conservative by default. This would mean that under a Kucinich administration everyone would be paying for everything with cheap pesos. I assume this would be the default result since to do nothing is the very definition of laissez faire which means that the furthest left you can move in capitalist politics today is to the conservative position of a Coolidge, which then explains why every party is so hawkishly moving to the extreme right, since a conservative is much to left wing to find a home in any political party these days, and that would include a Coolidge conservative by default, such as Dennis Kucinich.

Since the neo-conservative strategy of a George W. Bush seems to be the only available alternative to the laissez faire ruination brought down on everyone by a conservative like a Nixon or a Coolidge, and since no one else has any ideas to offer in competition to the Bush strategy, we should take a few moments to review the true workings of this neo-conservative agenda, so that we can contrast it with the only other available option today, and the only possible opponent to Bush in an election campaign, Calvin Coolidge.

The Capitalist Gospel according to Coolidge tells us that the American Dollar must become a real cheap peso and then American Imperialism must wander off the world stage, having had a good half century of global domination, and learn to play second or third fiddle during what would then no doubt be ‘The New European Century’ as the E.U. takes over as the dominant imperialist power of the globe. This option is unpalatable and it is for this reason that we now have ‘neo-conservatives’ working on that famous strategy of theirs to create what they call ‘The New American Century’. In this way neo-conservatives resemble a driver staring into the rear view mirror and then becoming deluded enough to think that they were actually looking at the road ahead. However they do have a plan, and since America has been pumped full of lead on the economic foot ball field, having been pummeled by another team of competitive jocks, the neo-conservatives will switch over to an arena of combat where America still exercises global supremacy, the arena of military combat and conquest.

Now the general strategy of the neo=conservative seems to be to buy some time for American capitalism by seizing strategic control of the petroleum reserves of Iraq and Iran as well as projecting American military power over the oil fields of the Caucasus region by invading Afghanistan. Of course America will only be accepting dollars in payment for all that petroleum and will not be accepting Euros, and in this way the world can be forced to continue to use the American Dollar as a reserve currency and continue to fund America’s ballooning deficits whether they want to or not. You can just never be to sure and while it is true that at the moment, given America’s historical role as the nation with the global reserve currency in the past, the Bush administration has been able to blackmail the entire planet, since there are trillions of American dollars spread over the world that no one wants to see turned into cheap pesos, this blackmail strategy might not last forever. This strategy must be concealed by disguising it as the war against Osama bin Laden, and then because there is no frank discussion of the issues in an American election campaign, the confused and ignorant Democratic voters will be found pressuring their party to ditch the ‘Bush Lite’ strategy which would mean running Calvin Coolidge as the Democratic party’s candidate for President.

While the Bush administration is buying time for the American dollar, the capitalists back home will have some breathing room giving them enough time to beat down the American worker and trash the middle class, by gutting every program and every benefit and pounding down wages. Bush will also run huge deficits by cutting taxes for really rich capitalists in the hopes that putting out a pot of honey will attract such busily investing bees, and those bees will also be attracted, the theory goes, by America’s real cheap pool of labor, now that no one has health care and Bush or some Democrat finally got rid of the burden of Social Security, making America so cheap that finally capitalism might get something going in that country. Since it is obvious that American workers will start getting rowdy when they are getting eight or nine bucks an hour with no health care while a bunch of rich capitalists are getting trillion dollar pots of honey to make them consider investing again in America, and for this reason it will be required that both the Bush administration and the Democrats start shredding the Constitution and the Bill of Rights so that the protestors in the country can be terrorized by the threat of arrest by cops and so on while American capitalism goes down the shitter.

This then is a rough sketch of the issues involved in the upcoming election, and describes the general strategy of both the Republicans and the Democrats, and by default, of everyone else who is also a supporter of American capitalism. As Margaret Thatcher put it, for the truly devoted supporter of capitalism, ‘there is no alternative.’ This is true, and this explains why there is no alternative at election time, nor will there ever again be any alternative at election time in America. From now on Americans will only be voting for George Bush in every election, because no one wants to run Calvin Coolidge as a candidate for president (with the possible exception of certain liberal democrats who don’t know what they are doing, and thus are proposing to run someone like Kucinich, which is the same as running a conservative like Coolidge).

My advice therefore is that everyone should vote for Bush and not vote for the Bush Lite being run in the elections by those Democrats, who are only running Bush Lite because there voters are supremely pissed off at them, thus causing them to look for ways and means to water down that stiff cocktail. Keep in mind that if you read the fine print when the Democrats speak of ‘withdrawing from Iraq’ they mean ‘withdrawing from the cities of Iraq’. American troops will of course remain in Iraq under the Democrats, they will just be withdrawn to the security of bases around the oil fields, and might provide air support from time to time for Iraqi government troops, but they will be withdrawn from day to day combat. You see, to ‘withdraw our troops from Iraq’ altogether would mean that the Democrats have finally decided to run Coolidge for President and just accept the judgment of the market and that cheap American Peso. For this reason it is probably best for everyone who supports capitalism in America to just vote for Bush, since it seems improbable that the Democrats will be able to hang onto only the oil fields of Iraq if the cities and the rest of the country goes to hell in a hand basket.

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